Throughout my life, I’ve experienced too many broken promises. The things I cared about most, I had stripped from me. Out of anger, I kept those that should be closest to me at arms length. I spent half my life filled with anger, pain, and sadness. Happiness has always been more of an illusion to me than anything. Every time I feel I’ve found happiness, when I feel I have it at my fingertips, it fades away and eludes me like some cheap magic trick that I can’t figure out. I’ve always had this concept or idea of what true happiness would be like, but that’s all it was; an idea. It was a dream never fulfilled. If anything, pain and sadness were my only friends. They were the only two things that I knew would never leave; and when they did, they’d always be come back to me…
Then, sometime mid september 2010, I met a girl. She was dressed in business attire. She was gorgeous! I’d like to say I talked to her and got her number and stuff but truth is… I hardly talked to her at all. I did add her on facebook though :P the next time we studied together, we exchanged numbers. I never asked… She had to initiate it. I guess it was because she made me too nervous. Anyway, she became the person I would text everyday. She was the one I wanted to be with. She’s beautiful, smart, funny, athletic, and the cool thing is… She’s a geek and likes video games hehe. She’s the one person I would spend my days dreaming about. We would go on what she would call “friend dates” and eventually I guess they turned into “dates.” :) as time went by, I grew to love this woman. She’s not some one in a million girl. She’s one of a kind. This woman has changed my life. Suddenly, I’m not so sad and angry anymore. she keeps me on track in school, she makes me feel loved, she helped me make things better with those people I’d push away. this is the happiest I have ever been. You know what the best part is? She’s not fake. I guess I mean that in more ways than one. She’s actually really blunt and speaks the truth. She’s not the type to say something behind your back. She’s also not an illusion. The best part is she’s real. I can hold her hand, hug her, and kiss her. I can talk to her and she’ll respond. She’s opinionated and isn’t just some person occupying a particular space in the world. She brought me happiness and I’m gonna make damn sure I make her happy too. if there’s anything I believe in, it’s us. Whatever comes our way, we’ll see it through. So to my girlfriend, Samantha Militante, I just wanted to say this… I Love You! Thanks for everything.
